BEING FUNNY IS SOMETIMES RUDE.

   

Humor comes in all sizes

Wild. Crazy. Stupid. Idiotic! Maybe I am. I don’t know. Mom always used to call us that. Until I was eight, I didn’t know my brothers’ real names. Turned out Mom had three kids and none of them were idiots. Wild is a professional speculator. Stupid’s worth ten million bucks and sits on his ass all day. I’m not crazy and I’m not an idiot, and I don’t have to write blogs like this for a living. I like to write. Well, maybe I am crazy

 . . . Which reminds me of another story. A young man was looking for the meaning of life. He heard about a guru on top of Pyramid Peak about twelve thousand feet up. Well, it was a long hike, sometimes without a trail and metaphorically speaking, more like a grind. At last, he came to the old one’s hut and got on his knees and begged for the answer. The old man said. “Do you know how a dog poops?” The young man looked quizzical. “Not really.”

“Do you know how a cow poops?” Was this a trick question? “Not sure,” replied the young man.

“Do you know how a horse poops?”

“No,” replied the young man.

There was a long pause. The guru jumped up. “You come here and take my time. And. you . . .”

“What?” asked the young man.

“You don’t know shit!”

 DON'T BE RUDE. 

   

Well, once I was a virgin. A virgin comic, I mean. I got up and told a funny story, but no one laughed. Then a young man came up and used dirty words, words that the audience couldn't say when they were growing up. I won't repeat them here. Don't want to be rude. Finally, I jumped up and screamed. "Freud said all you had to say was say the word 'KNOB'!

Funny, still nobody laughed. Oh well, sometimes being funny is rude. Live and learn.